Welcome to Is This What You Want?

Is This What You Want? (ITWYW) started in Winter/Spring 2021 by community care facilitator Christa Lei. Initially, the publication was intended to serve as an email-based wishlist for Christa over cute things they wanted to buy, or have bought and consumed. Inspired by the late Things I Bought That I Love, by Mindy Kaling, the first iteration was to be light-hearted and fun. It was a place for levity and lightness to the highest degree.

Deeper into the pandemic, and further into Christa’s practice, it became clear that this needed to be more than just a place for consumerist desires. ITWYW needed to serve as a place to write, process and grieve the violence of capitalism, colonization and Imperialism. The newsletter moved to another platform and returned to Substack in February 2024. The current iteration focuses on disabilities, advocacy, death work, community care, relationships, and intimacy.

Who is Christa?

Christa Lei grew up on Native Hawaiian land as the youngest child of Filipine immigrants. As a fat, neurodivergent, disabled, queer, polyamorous, and third-culture person, their identities inform their personal and professional work. Their previous and lived experiences in healthcare, clinical research and patient advocacy contribute to their current passions. A multi-modal and experienced creative, Christa creates and facilitates spaces for interdisciplinary praxis via community care.

As a speaker and organizer, they have presented workshops at the Midwest Love Fest and collaborated with community organizations like APICHA and Brooklyn Community Pride Center. An emerging writer, their work has appeared in activeMuse, Breath & Shadow, and Vast Chasm Magazine, amongst others. They are also certified as a death doula by Alua Arthur's Going with Grace.

In their spare time, they dance, sing, write, travel around the world, point out all the puppies on the street, preach the gospel of Shrek, and create shared futures with their chosen family of their loving spouse and two dogs in New York City. Connect with them on Instagram (@supchrista) or at christalei.me

instagram

twitter

tip me

Paid vs. Free

A free subscription gets you access to free posts, and podcast episodes.

A paid subscription gets you my eternal gratitude, and other special Paid subscriptions are only $7/month, which all things considered, is pretty wild. You also get more access to continued series, a paid podcast and further projects in development.

Give a gift subscription

Donate Subscriptions

Subscribe to is this what you want?

This is where I hash out the messy, funny, heartbreaking business of disability, care, and relationships—through my specific fat, queer, Fil-Am lens with pop culture riffs, spiritual side quests, and just enough magic to keep it weird.

People

Christa is a disabled, fat, queer, neurodivergent, polyamorous filipino-american living in NYC. they write, educate others in patient and self advocacy, build communities through communal care, and do fun, creative stuff with their comrades + pals.