we are not gilded butterflies

a reflection on pride, queerness and the state of the world

a brief note: this newsletter is based off social media posts I made recently, but expanded and delivered in messier form. 😂 enjoy. or don’t.

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it’s pride month,

and yet I hope you all realise that in the United States, many of the LGBTQIA+ and any marginalised genders are having their rights threatened.

heads up to the straight people— while you’re free to read this, it’s not directed at you. if a queer person invites you to a pride event, please realise that this month and the events are not centered around your comfort.

to my fellow queer family,

enjoy this month meant for us to celebrate who we are, in all of our splendour. but please remember the root of our joy: PRIDE is about celebrating the struggles and milestones that our queer ancestors led us through. our pride exists because of them. and it also exists because of us, we are people trying to continually fight for our rights to be preserved. there are marginalised sub-populations of our family that are still threatened, who get brutally beaten up, abused, and worst of all— killed, due to their identities. our trans siblings are fighting for their lives in certain states to gain access to crucial medical care and to have the right to exist. we must remember they are part of us too, that we must fight for them like we have fought for ourselves and those who came before us.

it’s easy to lose sight of this when there’s a different party being thrown in our faces every weekend. our social calendars fill up during june and it melts into a haze of debauchery and fading memories. it’s difficult to see that corporations treat us like the butterflies in the picture: we are only allowed to exist as beautiful objects in the world if it serves their purposes and they can commodify our struggles into a neat, rainbow infused and decorated package to sell to the masses.

we are not fragile butterflies stuck in gilded cages for people to enjoy as a temporary delight. queer people do not exist for the entertainment of cishet society. some of us are still stuck in cocoons, waiting to be released from the chrysalis and yearning for freedom. some of us are hiding behind the comfort of our other friends, banded together. celebrate responsibly, and remember our joy and our existence cannot be erased, and therefore we must fight back harder, especially for those still stuck in their cocoons, or for those forced to stay there.

i’m not trying to be preachy, i’m just fatigued. i wish we existed in a world that fully accepted queerness for what it is, and the possibilities it could be. maybe i’m writing for people who haven’t found community and are trying to find more of it. maybe I’m trying to remind myself that I’m part of this community despite my exhaustion, maybe I’m posturing. who knows at this point?

i’m feeling a lot of emotions during this month. it’s okay if you are too. one of the beautiful things I’ve learned from therapy = emotions are complex, as are humans. feeling multiple amounts of things at once makes you human. the pride i have as a queer person can still exist amongst the sadness and rage i have for the US government, the communities that fervently admonish our kin, and the lack of response for the most vulnerable of our family.

celebrate responsively, remember to love, and fight for our rights, continuously.